Forgiveness is powerful.
But sometimes in love and relationships, we forgive the wrong people. Sometimes we’re tied closely to people who hurt us, and we think that we must forgive them to move forward, to save a relationship, to fix what has been torn apart, to give ourselves closure.
Listen — forgiving someone doesn’t mean you allow them a free passage back into your heart. It doesn’t mean that you open the doors to your life and give them the key.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you need to keep that person in your life.
Yes, you can forgive someone for cheating. You can forgive someone for breaking your heart. You can forgive someone for abandoning you in a time of need, for walking away, for not putting you first, for letting you go.
But that doesn’t mean you need to trust that person again.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re obligated to stay in a relationship with someone who has destroyed the foundation of everything you’ve built. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you keep a close friendship with the person who betrayed you.
Forgiveness means you accept what wrongs have been done to you, you let them go, and you begin again — with or without that person. You get to decide. Repeat that again — you get to decide, and you are not any less of a person for knowing when you need distance from people who have broken you. You are not spiteful, hateful, bad, or evil for taking time to heal. You are not wrong for forgiving and leaving that person in your past.
So please do not think forgiveness means you must stay.
Please, remember your worth, and know that you deserve a love that doesn’t leave. Know that forgiving someone does not make you weak, but gives you strength. Strength enough to let go, to move on, and to grow.
-@_marisadonnelly (via @thoughtcatalog // instagram)